Forum barfight

[Techno]

That deserves your coat being FLUNG at you !! 

[Westmarcher]

That deserves your coat being FLUNG at you !! 

I know. Even I cringed when I clicked on "Post" 

Davy

[Westmarcher]

Come to think of it ... it was not that bad ... (says he just back from pub  ) .... its the kinda thing you'd expect from Tim Vine, I suppose.  

Speaking of Tim Vine (all his own work) ....

"So I was getting into my car, and this bloke says to me "Can you give me a lift?" I said "Sure, you look great, the world's your oyster, go for it.'"

"You see I'm against hunting, in fact I'm a hunt saboteur. I go out the night before and shoot the fox."

... and finally ...

"Apparently, 1 in 5 people in the world are Chinese. And there are 5 people in my family, so it must be one of them. It's either my mum or my dad. Or my older brother Colin.
Or my younger brother Ho-Chan-Chu. But I think it's Colin." 

[getagrip]

Other Tim Vine:

I was at a football match and at the start the ref came out, I thought: this is going to kick off.

I watched 90 minutes, it was 0-0, then some Japanese blokes dressed in black came out: we had 30 minutes of ninjary time.

[Techno]

 

[Westmarcher]

 

That deserves your coat being FLUNG at you !! 

In my part of Scotland, we say, "Get aeys jaykit!"
........ which is much better than, "Pick a windae!" 


Soooo, when is this bar going to open again?
(cabbage whizzes past left ear)  ....... ............... is "Crackerjack back on?" ........]

[Duke Speedy of Leighton]

Has no one told him the opening hours yet?

[Lord Kermit of Birkenhead]

24/7 . changed by that nice Mr Blair about 10 years ago....

IanS

[Last Hussar]

Its jokes like those that can start a bar figh.... oh.

[nikharwood]

Its jokes like those that can start a bar figh.... oh.

[Duke Speedy of Leighton]

Right, which of you lot put 'It's a small world' on repeat on the jukebox?!?
Some of us work here you know!

[getagrip]

I've just had the back off the jukebox and all the cd's have been swapped for "it's a small world"....

Apart from one which is labelled: "Dogtanian" and it's got this weird green stuff all over it

[Techno]

Nuffin' to do with me, Tosh !

[Hertsblue]

I was out feeding the piranhas - hang on while I count my fingers.

[fsn]

I've just been having a dip in the new pool - the one where the fish nibble at your dead skin - excellent - they even feed you sausages - thought to be honest they tasted like unwashed hands.