Forum barfight

[Techno]

 

[Hertsblue]

It's making me limp!

Viagra, maybe?

[get2grips]

Viagra, maybe?

Dear Lord NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

FSN's pills are controlled by a very strict regime; any adjustment, however small, coud upset the tenuous grip he currently has on sanity.

[fsn]

Ooooh! I now fancy some Salt and Viagra crisps! With the little blue packet.

[Duke Speedy of Leighton]

Cheesy bunion?
747?
Assault and viagra?
Hardcore and prawn?
No, that's the totty thread!

[fsn]

The blue crisps Hertsblue gave me don't half taste funny.

Is that discarded stripper still in the skip?

*notices grenado fizzing on floor from "the Musketeers" thread*

If you'll excuse me Gentlemen, I've got an award winning army to paint!

[Duke Speedy of Leighton]

*Langudly picks up grenade, drops it in FSN's half finished pint of grenadine*

Litter bug!

[fsn]

Oooh! A flaming cocktail! With a very large black olive in it!

[nikharwood]

Is that discarded stripper still in the skip?

I refer my learned friend to my previous answer...

You lot can carry on with your kangaroo's testicles.

I'm off to un-discard the stripper  

[fsn]

I really luvv you lot youu know except you  *points in a random direction*'cos you paint gooder than me. Hurry up with that skip! I'm tired. Did I tell you that I luvv  you all? Don't get out much, see? *Burp*

Anyway, I readed somewhee that British soldiers. British soldiers right? British soldiers used to fake heart disease. That's like a dickie ticker *thumps chest to illustrate 'dickie ticker' and beging coughing. Takes another swig of grenadine and grenado.* Right, so BRITISH soldiers right, used to ... now I'm not saying they do this now, 'cos they *eyes fill with tears, throat catches with emotion* they ... are  .. the best people, and we all ought to get down on our knees and pray for them every day. I do ... and I don't even believ in godd *winks knowingly*.

Has he not finished with that skip yyet? I heard the stripper laughing - you know the laugh? The wee willie winkie laugh? No. Neither do I, but I heard it anyway. *Burp, slightly solid. Slow chewing for a moment. Takes another swig.* Oh poo! The little candle thing's gone out.

Anyway, right, British soldiers used to fake heart disesases by sticking tobaccoo up their bum. Up ...  their .. bum. Right? Could you belif it? Tobaccoo up the bum. Must have been hell to light *laughs uproariously*.  Anyway, right. What I want to know is, right, look at me, look at me, right, 'cos I'm being serious.

Did I tell you I lov you all? Did I? *tears up again* 'cos without you, I've got nothing. Cept some lovely, lovely Centurions. You're all all right. All right. Anyway, what I wanted to know is who first found out that sticking tobacco up your bum mimics a heart condition?

*Finished drink with a flourish and passes out*

[get2grips]

Credits roll...

"Where everybody knows your na-aaame...."

[Fenton]

I really luvv you lot youu know except you  *points in a random direction*'cos you paint gooder than me. Hurry up with that skip! I'm tired. Did I tell you that I luvv  you all? Don't get out much, see? *Burp*

Anyway, I readed somewhee that British soldiers. British soldiers right? British soldiers used to fake heart disease. That's like a dickie ticker *thumps chest to illustrate 'dickie ticker' and beging coughing. Takes another swig of grenadine and grenado.* Right, so BRITISH soldiers right, used to ... now I'm not saying they do this now, 'cos they *eyes fill with tears, throat catches with emotion* they ... are  .. the best people, and we all ought to get down on our knees and pray for them every day. I do ... and I don't even believ in godd *winks knowingly*.

Has he not finished with that skip yyet? I heard the stripper laughing - you know the laugh? The wee willie winkie laugh? No. Neither do I, but I heard it anyway. *Burp, slightly solid. Slow chewing for a moment. Takes another swig.* Oh poo! The little candle thing's gone out.

Anyway, right, British soldiers used to fake heart disesases by sticking tobaccoo up their bum. Up ...  their .. bum. Right? Could you belif it? Tobaccoo up the bum. Must have been hell to light *laughs uproariously*.  Anyway, right. What I want to know is, right, look at me, look at me, right, 'cos I'm being serious.

Did I tell you I lov you all? Did I? *tears up again* 'cos without you, I've got nothing. Cept some lovely, lovely Centurions. You're all all right. All right. Anyway, what I wanted to know is who first found out that sticking tobacco up your bum mimics a heart condition?

*Finished drink with a flourish and passes out*

Bloody Hell...I hate to see what he's like when Mad Lemmey actually puts alcohol in his drink instead of just Raspberry cordial

[Hertsblue]

Credits roll...

"Where everybody knows your na-aaame...."

Please don't ask for credit, since a sock in the teeth often offends....

[Lord Kermit of Birkenhead]

Start a slate please, he said producing the 9mm Browning.

IanS

[Hertsblue]

Cocks the sawn-off shotgun under the bar....

[OldenBUA]

Yanks carpet from under Ian, topples shelf on Herts, waves hat in general direction of others, then swngs from chandelier while shouting "SAY, DID NO ONE EVER PLAY THAT OLD YAQUINTO GAME SWASHBUCKLER?!"

[Hertsblue]

And we reckon fsn's doolally! 

[OldenBUA]

Well, we're all mad, and I reckon FSN hasn't got ANY allies! 

[fsn]

Well, we're all mad, and I reckon FSN hasn't got ANY allies! 

*From the floor*
s'true. Nobody loves me! 

Nobody 'cept the Centruion. Lovely, lovely, Centruion.
*Curls up in a contended ball and falls asleep*

[Duke Speedy of Leighton]

Nother round anyone?