So Matron has claimed an accident free 18 hours.

Let's see.

I'm also running a book, PM me and I'll let you have the latest odds.

Better odds if you can name the injury.

I think Matron's voted, no-one else can believe it's never can they?

25 hours and  not even a scratch !.....And I've fired another bonfire tonight, without falling in....Or setting fire to anything else.....Like the hill behind Techno Towers.....Yet.

I'll tell you about a VERY 'close shave' with a short scythe, one day......Didn't do any actual damage, for a change....But I was SO Bl**dy close to severing either my jugular, or my carotid artery....
Can never remember which is on which side.....Sadly, it's true (again)  
Cheers - Phil

The never vote was not me.....But I thank whoever has that much faith in me.....Muppet ! 

Quote from: Techno on 02 April 2015, 07:36:27 PM
The never vote was not me.....But I thank whoever has that much faith in me.....Muppet ! 

Guilty as charged

"Always look on the bright side of life ......"

Don't have any clever ideas with the scythe ; your foot might fall off.

That little scythe has long gone.....
Fortunately. 

Quote from: Ithoriel on 02 April 2015, 09:43:38 PM
Guilty as charged
"Always look on the bright side of life ......"

Cheers - Phil

Put the knife DOWN....

IanS

Within the next 4 hours seems to be popular and reflects,  in a very real sense,  our belief in Matron's inability to protect himself. 

No, no, no. Betting on Techno injuring himself is not on! I'm going to report you all to the RSPCA!   

Quote from: Hertsblue on 03 April 2015, 10:35:05 AM
No, no, no. Betting on Techno injuring himself is not on! I'm going to report you all to the RSPCA!   

   

I would like it to be recognised by the RSPCA that I voted for him NOT hurting himself.

Also, being North of the Border I demand to be tried by the SSPCA!

48 hours......
Cheers - Phil

Quote from: Techno on 03 April 2015, 06:39:20 PM
48 hours......
Cheers - Phil

The fact you are proud of it says it all really. 

Is it true Phil that you were the inspiration for the board game Operation?

From the Western Daily Mail, April 4th

"... an elderly man was rushed to hospital last night after a bizarre accident involving a bonfire, a chain saw, two strangely decorated boiled eggs and the Nottingham Street Map from 1986. The man, cautiously identified by sheepish locals as Phil the Matron, and 'ooh ... that odd fellow who keeps playing with his little thingies', is thought to be conscious, but not coherent. Then again, this may be his natural state. The man's wife was not hurt in the accident, but her wooly cardigan was ruined.

As he was loaded into the ambulance, the man was heard to shout '49 hours, 27 minutes. Tell them 49 hours 27 minutes.'

The boiled eggs have been destroyed by the Police, and the Nottingham Street Map taken into protective care."