John Betjeman famously wrote

QuoteCome friendly bombs and fall on Slough!

Such is the history of the English language and geography, that for non-native speakers – like Americans - it would not be immediately obvious how to pronounce 'Slough', though the next line's rhyme -

QuoteIt isn't fit for humans now,

would demonstrate it

However, if he had written

QuoteI've had just about enough

they would be none the wiser.  Of course he could have used

QuoteYour belching chimneys make me cough

and it would have still looked right, though I can not imagine how it would rhyme with

QuoteIt is a God forsaken borough

Though (look another one) this would have let him go on to

QuoteYou are not as fine as Edinburgh

to really confuse things.  Or maybe the second line could be

QuoteYou're roads have become really slow.

Half the problem is the huge number of words that we've imported from other languages. We've retained their particular spelling without any thought as to how it would gell with our own conventions. And proper names don't count - otherwise how does Cholmondly come out as "Chumly"?

Having said all this, it must be admitted that English pronunciation is a real pig's breakfast - not helped by many regional variations.

"English doesn't borrow from other languages. It follows them down dark alleys, knocks them over and rummages through their pockets for loose grammar."
-- Unknown

"English is the result of Norman soldiers attempting to pick up Anglo-Saxon barmaids, and is no more legitimate than any of the other results."
-- H. Beam Piper

We also suffer from the fact that the printing trade was long dominated by Dutchmen who were paid by the letter.

Someone form Smoggy trying to teach us pronunciation.......

Der.

IanS

In the mists of time, when all was shades of grey (no, I don't know how many!), black and white, TV used to show Will Hay films.  I seem to recall dimly one called "The Goose Steps Out" where Will was parachuted into Germany to instruct German spies destined for deployment to England. Film also featured an early role for Charles Hawtrey of Carry On fame.  The scene that stands out is a microcosm of this thread, but culminates in Will leading the students in giving the V sign to a portrait of the Fuhrer.  As an adolescent I found it very funny but then ..... those were the days... dribble, dribble,  snore. 

Mollinary

Reminds me of when my French teacher wrote 'ghoti' on the blackboard and asked how it was pronounced.
I'll wait and see if anyone can work it out before posting his answer 

fish

Had you heard it before or did you google it? (which I did after posting to find it has a Wikipedia page, well doesn't everything)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ghoti

It's been around quite some time.

At primary school, a teacher wrote "Tin tin tin" on the board and asked what it said. Took a while  but I got it eventually. That was about the Yorkshire dialect, though, rather than spelling.

Sent from my phone using Tapatalk

Spell Hedgehog using only 4 letters:

EGOG

 French rather than English but also using letters for words and you have to read it aloud:

Fritz to Voltaire--          p                  c
                            ----------     a     ---------- 
                            venez              Sans


Voltaire to Fritz---    G a


Which being translated is:

Venez souper a Sans Souci

J'ai grand appétit

Apologies for lack of grave accents!