Poll
Question:
When will Matron (AKA Techno, AKA Phil) next hurt himself?
Option 1: Within the next 4 hours.
votes: 4
Option 2: Between 4 and 8 hours.
votes: 1
Option 3: Between 8 and 16 hours.
votes: 2
Option 4: Between 16 and 24 hours.
votes: 2
Option 5: More than 24 hours.
votes: 3
Option 6: Never, he has learned from previous mistakes. (Yeah, I know, just had to include it for contast).
votes: 4
So Matron has claimed an accident free 18 hours. :-\
Let's see.
I'm also running a book, PM me and I'll let you have the latest odds. :D
Better odds if you can name the injury. :D :D :D
I think Matron's voted, no-one else can believe it's never can they? :D
25 hours and not even a scratch !.....And I've fired another bonfire tonight, without falling in....Or setting fire to anything else.....Like the hill behind Techno Towers.....Yet.
I'll tell you about a VERY 'close shave' with a short scythe, one day......Didn't do any actual damage, for a change....But I was SO Bl**dy close to severing either my jugular, or my carotid artery....
Can never remember which is on which side.....Sadly, it's true (again) :-[ :-[ :-[ X_X
Cheers - Phil
The never vote was not me.....But I thank whoever has that much faith in me.....Muppet ! ;) ;D ;D ;D
Quote from: Techno on 02 April 2015, 07:36:27 PM
The never vote was not me.....But I thank whoever has that much faith in me.....Muppet ! ;) ;D ;D ;D
Guilty as charged :)
"Always look on the bright side of life ......" :D
Don't have any clever ideas with the scythe ; your foot might fall off. ;)
That little scythe has long gone.....
Fortunately. ;)
Quote from: Ithoriel on 02 April 2015, 09:43:38 PM
Guilty as charged :)
"Always look on the bright side of life ......" :D
;D ;D ;D ;D
Cheers - Phil
Put the knife DOWN....
IanS
Within the next 4 hours seems to be popular and reflects, in a very real sense, our belief in Matron's inability to protect himself. :D
No, no, no. Betting on Techno injuring himself is not on! I'm going to report you all to the RSPCA! :d
Quote from: Hertsblue on 03 April 2015, 10:35:05 AM
No, no, no. Betting on Techno injuring himself is not on! I'm going to report you all to the RSPCA! :d
;D ;D ;D
I would like it to be recognised by the RSPCA that I voted for him NOT hurting himself.
Also, being North of the Border I demand to be tried by the SSPCA! :)
48 hours...... :)
Cheers - Phil
Quote from: Techno on 03 April 2015, 06:39:20 PM
48 hours...... :)
Cheers - Phil
The fact you are proud of it says it all really. :D
Is it true Phil that you were the inspiration for the board game Operation?
From the Western Daily Mail, April 4th
"... an elderly man was rushed to hospital last night after a bizarre accident involving a bonfire, a chain saw, two strangely decorated boiled eggs and the Nottingham Street Map from 1986. The man, cautiously identified by sheepish locals as Phil the Matron, and 'ooh ... that odd fellow who keeps playing with his little thingies', is thought to be conscious, but not coherent. Then again, this may be his natural state. The man's wife was not hurt in the accident, but her wooly cardigan was ruined.
As he was loaded into the ambulance, the man was heard to shout '49 hours, 27 minutes. Tell them 49 hours 27 minutes.'
The boiled eggs have been destroyed by the Police, and the Nottingham Street Map taken into protective care."
=D> =D> =D>
Quote from: fsn on 03 April 2015, 08:20:23 PM
From the Western Daily Mail, April 4th
"... an elderly man was rushed to hospital last night after a bizarre accident involving a bonfire, a chain saw, two strangely decorated boiled eggs and the Nottingham Street Map from 1986. The man, cautiously identified by sheepish locals as Phil the Matron, and 'ooh ... that odd fellow who keeps playing with his little thingies', is thought to be conscious, but not coherent. Then again, this may be his natural state. The man's wife was not hurt in the accident, but her wooly cardigan was ruined.
As he was loaded into the ambulance, the man was herd to shout '49 hours, 27 minutes. Tell them 49 hours 27 minutes.'
The boiled eggs have been destroyed by the Police, and the Nottingham Street Map taken into protective care."
;D ;D ;D
;D =D> ;D
(Fenton and, of course, fsn)
Leave me alone !
You're all horrid.b-(
Cheers - Phil.
We only do it because we love you. It's like pulling the pigtails on the girl we like.
>:<
Now go and sculpt something.
Yeah, or Nobby will pull your hair!
Phil made a cutting remark once.
7 hours in A&E
;D ;D ;D
Quote from: Last Hussar on 04 April 2015, 08:40:11 AM
Phil made a cutting remark once. 7 hours in A&E
Gross exaggeration !It was 2 hours, after the accident with the hedge cutters. (YEARS ago)
(Use hedge cutters right handed..... Clear cut bits of hedge away with left hand.....Get timing wrong...Bring blades and left hand together.....Squeak pitifully !........Can't even see the scar now......But it was a
right mess......Thankfully I cut down the finger, rather than across)....Sadly true, again. :-[
Cheers - Phil
:o
It beggars belief the number of accidents you've had!
Yes......But (so far) I've been a jammy g*t and got away without serious injury !
Only time I thought "Oh ****, what have I done," was when one of the horses threw me, and I landed on my neck and shoulders.
That was a scary half a minute, lying dazed, making sure I still had feeling in my hands and feet.
Own stupid fault again....A non rider getting on a gee-gee without a saddle or head collar, and just holding on to the mane......She took off, because a couple of ponies she was sharing the field with thought it would be fun to have a race.
Mrs T said she was really impressed that I managed to stay in place the first time 'Hippy' did a huge buck......The second time.....I went flying.
I've not got on a horse, since.
Cheers - Phil
Just a few suggestions to keep you safe.
(http://thumbs.dreamstime.com/z/american-ww11-aircrew-body-armor-19543211.jpg)
Very retro.
(http://www.cardiffbrawl.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2013/09/brewster-body-armor-1917-18.jpg)
I know, you found this one uncomfortable first time round.
(http://realdoctorstu.files.wordpress.com/2011/01/eod-bomb-disposal-suit.jpg)
this one leaves the hands free for sculpting.
(http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2014/12/31/2457F0AF00000578-2892459-image-m-79_1420030665816.jpg)
Not sure this one is too practical.
3rd one down works for me. ;)
Matron in the 4th... :o :o :o :-&
Quote from: Techno on 05 April 2015, 12:46:50 PM
Only time I thought "Oh ****, what have I done," was when one of the horses threw me, and I landed on my neck and shoulders.
Only moment I had like that was getting a "stinger" on the rugby pitch. Actually thought I'd broken my neck! Very scary!
Why not just get a dalek shell,it has sculpting tools and optovisor built in
Quote from: getagrip on 05 April 2015, 01:18:20 PM
3rd one down works for me. ;)
Matron in the 4th... :o :o :o :-&
Only moment I had like that was getting a "stinger" on the rugby pitch. Actually thought I'd broken my neck! Very scary!
NOT nice !
Cheers - Phil
Thinking you might have busted your neck......(Shiver !!!!!!!!!)
Cheers - Phil
If you will play these rough games.... :D
Quote from: Techno on 05 April 2015, 05:40:40 PM
Thinking you might have busted your neck......(Shiver !!!!!!!!!)
Cheers - Phil
I tell you, a stinger is horrific. I was lying on the floor and could hear someone screaming...turns out it was me! :-[