Cupboard

[Chad]

A woman takes a lover home during the day while her husband is at work.

Her 9 year old son comes home unexpectedly, sees them, and hides in the bedroom cupboard to watch. Just after getting into bed the woman's husband also comes home unexpectedly, she tells her lover to hide in the cupboard, not realising that the little boy is in there.

After a little while the little boy says, 'Dark in here.

The man, who obviously got a real fright not expecting to hear anything, let alone from a little boy says, 'Yes, it is.'

Boy - 'I have a football.'

Man - 'That's nice.'

Boy - 'Want to buy it?'

Man - 'No, thanks.'

Boy - 'My dad's outside.'

Man - 'OK, how much?'

Boy - '$ 250'

In the next few weeks, it happens again that the boy and the lover are in the cupboard together.

Boy - 'Dark in here.'

Man - 'Yes, it is.'

Boy - 'I have football boots.'

The lover, remembering the last time, asks the boy, 'OK How much this time?'


Boy - '$ 750'

Man - 'Sold.'

A few days later, the boys' father says to the boy, 'Grab your boots and football, let's go outside and have a game of soccer.

The boy says, 'I can't, I sold my ball and boots.'
The father asks, 'How much did you sell them for and to who?'


The boy says, 'To a friend of mine for a $ 1,000....'

The father says, 'That's a terrible thing to do, overcharging your friend like that'. 'That's four times what they cost when they were new, I'm going to take you to church and make you confess your terrible sins.'


They go to the church and the father makes the little boy sit in the confession booth and he closes the door.

The boy says, 'Dark in here'...

The priest says, 'Don't start that crap again you little prat, you're in my cupboard now'!!

[Techno]

 
Like it Chad!
But aren't you still supposed to be working for just another hour or so......You haven't retired until then young man.
Cheers - Phil.

[Leon]

 

[Chad]

Phil

Finished at midday, so no I was home free.

Chad

[DaveL]

It's ok for these retired gentle folk - while the rest of us are out at work paying their pensions!!!!!   

Happy Retirement Chad.  You can try to keep up with me painting wise now!!!

Talking about priests........

A girl goes into the confessional and says, "Forgive me Father for I have sinned."

The priest asks her what her sin is.

She replies, "Well Father, I don't wear any knickers."

"God will forgive you my child," he says.

"Say 3 Hail Mary's, and on the way out, do a cartwheel!!!!"

DaveL

[Techno]

Dave....Oh good grief !

Chad.....Really enjoy it now Matey.
Bet it'll seem strange next week.
Get those paints out !
Does the Acklobeast know you've reached this age now ?

Cheers - Phil. (P.S.  I only give a 10% discount for special commissioned work for pensioners on a Wednesday afternoon between 1pm and 1.01 pm... Unfortunately I tend to be eating my 'sarnies' then. )

[Duke Speedy of Leighton]

Well done for surviving Chad, enjoy the days! 

[mollinary]

Congratulations Chad,  I'm right behind you! 

Mollinary

[Chad]

Gentlemen thank you for your kind words.

'Da boss' says I can have next week off! 

Phil - I have a Facebook connection with Tone so I would imagine he does. By the way your discount for pensioners is only matched by your personal beauty, Quasimodo! 

Cheers

Chad

[Techno]

 

[Hertsblue]

It's ok for these retired gentle folk - while the rest of us are out at work paying their pensions!!!!!   

DaveL

Who do you suppose was paying the child-benefit when you were growing up? 

Happy retirement, Chad. 

[sebigboss79]

OMG!!!   

[petercooman]

Who do you suppose was paying the child-benefit when you were growing up? 

Happy retirement, Chad. 

"Touché, puddy cat"

[FierceKitty]

All these straight priests! What planet is this brand of Catholicism practised on?

[Orcs]

All these straight priests! What planet is this brand of Catholicism practised on?

Its the Jimmy Saville version of catholicism