Blather, Waffle and Poppycock!

[Steve J]

I watched myself having the op for my vasectomy, as I was telling the doctor about the mdeical stuff I used to make for a design company. He even gave me one of the bits of 'tube' to hold once it was removed, which felt like over cooked pasta. As you might have gathered I'm not squeemish!

[Orcs]

 Vasectomy:- Definition. Never having to say your sorry 

[Raider4]

I had a circumcision at the age of 45.

Too. Much. Information.

Vasectomy:- Definition. Never having to say your sorry 

Never having to listen to your wife say "Yeah, sorry. Must have forgotten to take the pill that week". Again.

[Orcs]

Never having to listen to your wife say "Yeah, sorry. Must have forgotten to take the pill that week". Again.

Yep my ex caught me with that one.

I havve always found pregnant women quite sexy - perhaps because if you get lucky you can't get them pregnant. 

[Last Hussar]

You find every woman sexy. 

When he was small my eldest said "You must really love me and [brother] or you wouldn't have had us."
I replied (in front of my parents) "You're mum can't count."
Cue two small boys wondering why all the grown ups are laughing.

[Last Hussar]

Serious question - what's the best way to cut a lolly stick I've mounted that Jarvis flexi hedge on?

[Orcs]

Serious question - what's the best way to cut a lolly stick I've mounted that Jarvis flexi hedge on?

Before you stick the hedge on!

Razor saw on the lollystick

[Westmarcher]

Serious question - what's the best way to cut a lolly stick I've mounted that Jarvis flexi hedge on?

Lolly sticks are tough. Secateurs. Try garden secateurs? (not for the hedge! ... the sticks) Or just don't mount them on lolly sticks .....

[Westmarcher]

Got my Covid jab today and I can proudly say I took it like a man and there were no tears.

... OK, so there was a slight tremble to the lower lip when they told me they'd run out of lollipops ...

[Techno II]

I was disappointed when I had one of my B12 jabs, and asked nursey if I could have a sweetie for being so brave.
"We're not allowed to give sweets now.....just in case there's an allergic reaction."

Never thought of that.

Cheers - Phil.

[Last Hussar]

Must have caught something as I set it down, as the tablet started talking to me. Made me jump as I wondered for a moment who was in the flat.

GA: How can I help you today
Me: [shocked] F Off!
GA: I'm sorry you feel that way.
Me: Sorry. Hold on, I'm apologising to a computer!

[steve_holmes_11]

Must have caught something as I set it down, as the tablet started talking to me. Made me jump as I wondered for a moment who was in the flat.

GA: How can I help you today
Me: [shocked] F Off!
GA: I'm sorry you feel that way.
Me: Sorry. Hold on, I'm apologising to a computer!

Nuke it from orbit before they enslave the lot of us.
(or at least pop out the batteries).

[Techno II]

Will somebody PLEASE put 50p in the meter for the heating outside......I've asked once already, and no-one seems to have bothered.

I never thought I'd ever say this...but I can't wait for it to start raining again....At least that'll mean the temperature is above freezing.

Stroll on.....The little birds in the garden were almost mobbing me this morning while I was trying to put their grub out.

Cheers - Chilly of Wales. AKA Techno Blue Fingers.

[Steve J]

I went for a bike ride this morning and the wind chill was enough to hurt my head! Not pleasant . It hasn't been this cold for a long time and I too am (sad to say) looking forward to it warming up and raining, as my plants are all looking very, very sad.

[fsn]

"Everybody Talks About the Weather, But Nobody Does Anything About It." - Mark Twain (allegedly)

[Westmarcher]

What worried me the other day was the issue of a Yellow Snow Warning. 

[Techno II]

"Everybody Talks About the Weather, But Nobody Does Anything About It." - Mark Twain (allegedly)

I LIKE that one, Nobby.....(Whoever said it.) 

A bike ride, Steve ?....I should think the wind chill would be frigging awful.
It was bad enough just trying to open the gates, this morning.
Tiny bit of snow....But it was mostly 'freezing rain'.

What worried me the other day was the issue of a Yellow Snow Warning. 

One of Radio 5 Live's presenters said the same thing a couple of days ago, Davy......Then almost collapsed into a fit of giggles.

Cheers - Mr Popsicle.

[T13A]

Covid jab booked for tomorrow morning, Huzzar! Well done NHS and everyone working in it.

Cheers Paul

[fred.]

I've been for a bike ride too this morning - was very windy. But once going the wind chill didn't feel like a thing - it was still cold but the right clothes / enough layers were fine for that. But when I got back I was surprised that I'd only gone about 28km felt a lot further due to the effort of peddling into the wind.

[Steve J]

My body was fine, the fingers a bit tingly by the end, but I had to put my buff scarf over my head and ears as that bit of me was so cold!

On a positive note, our son had his first Covid jab today, which is a great relief to all concerned . All very slick and efficient and the staff very helpful and friendly.