Forum barfight

[Fenton]

Don't bother going to see 50 Shades of Grey.  There is NOT ONE Austrian uniform in it.  Very misleading title.

I had always presumed the book and the film were all about the life and times of John Major

[Westmarcher]

Don't bother going to see 50 Shades of Grey.  There is NOT ONE Austrian uniform in it.  Very misleading title.

My in-laws went to see Last Tango in Paris thinking it was a dance picture! 

My Dad went to see The Guns of Navarone thinking it was a western. 

[getagrip]

I went to see Lesbos in Love;

I honestly thought it was about a holiday romance in Greece

Coat's already on

[Westmarcher]

 

[Last Hussar]

"Went to see" = "delivered discreetly in plain package"

[Duke Speedy of Leighton]

Lol

[Ithoriel]

"Went to see" = "delivered discreetly in plain package"

For goodness sake! Don't you know this is the Century of the Fruitbat! Performed by the tiny demons the wizard Jobs trapped within his iPod!

[Hertsblue]

I thought it was a review of garden structures - Fifty Sheds of Grey.

[Ithoriel]

Written by Jabba the Shed?

[getagrip]

No, Pizza the Hut

[Westmarcher]

  (Hoe, hoe, hoe)

[getagrip]

  (Hoe, hoe, hoe)

What a tool

[Techno]

Coat time !

[fsn]

I'm so nervous about the competition, I need a drink.

What's this sign? "You can drink from my slipper"?

I'm not falling for that one again. Last time I thought he said the slipper belonged to "Milday", but he actually said "mmm ... Lemmey".

Took me ages to get the taste of corn plaster out my mouth, and the policeman didn't believe me when I said it was athlete's foot powder round my nose. Suppose I should have guessed when it was a size 11. Either that or because it was shaped as Homer Simpson. In my defence, I've never had a good look at Milady's feet - obviously because she's always in a ball gown - and Lemmey's slingbacks are quite deceptive.

This time it's one of Techno's slippers. That'll probably be some sort of old Croc (make your own jokes up) with unidentified equine substances on the sole. He'll be  slopping around a soggy field with one bare foot. Probably thinks it's some kind of living archaeology, though it's doubtless still de rigeur in the backend of the backend of Wales in which he lives.

Think I'll pass on the slipper. What's the guest beer? Fierce Kitty's Bitter. Oh ... that's not the guest beer ... that's just a statement of fact. Is that the guest beer there? Fenton's Firkin! Is that just a statement? ... no? I think I'll pass anyway. The name just puts images in my mind I don't want there.

Perhaps I'll just have a glass of wine. The house white today is ... Ouestmarcheur Pap du Slop, 2015. Should it have that many cobwebs on it when it's so young? Wonder where it's been? Let's see the description ... "fruity, cheeky with a hint of rhubarb. Should be laid down  ... for a long time. A really long time." Not really selling it to me.

What's this? Cocktail of the day? A White Russian?

That's for me!

 

[Duke Speedy of Leighton]

Strange no one ever orders Red Russians...

Can you sling my slingback back please, Techno's Guinness is hell to scrape out, especially when he's been mucking out with them.

Size 9, wide fitting btw! 💃