A Blonde was sent on her way to Heaven.
Upon arrival, a concerned St Peter met her at the Pearly Gates.
'I'm sorry, 'St Peter said; 'But Heaven is suffering from an overload
of goodly souls and we have been forced to put up an Entrance Exam for
new arrivals to ease the burden of Heavenly Arrivals.'
'That's cool' said the blonde, 'What does the Entrance Exam consist
of?'
'Just three questions' said St Peter.
'Which are?' asked the blonde.
'The first,' said St Peter, 'is, which two days of the week start with
the letter 'T'
'The second is 'How many seconds are there in a year?'
‘The third is 'What was the name of the swagman in Waltzing Matilda?'
'Now,' said St Peter, 'Go away and think about those questions and when
I call upon you, I shall expect you to have those answers for me.'
So the blonde went away and gave those three questions some
considerable thought (I expect you to do the same).
The following morning, St Peter called upon the blonde and asked if she
had considered the questions, to which she replied, 'I have.'
'Well then,' said St Peter, 'Which two days of the week start with the
letter T?'
The blonde said, 'Today and Tomorrow.'
St Peter pondered this answer for some time, and decided that indeed
the answer can be applied to the question.
'Well then, could I have your answer to the second of the three
questions?'
St Peter went on, 'how many seconds in a year?'
The Blonde replied, 'Twelve!'
'Only twelve?' exclaimed St Peter, 'How did you arrive at that figure?'
'Easy,' said the blonde, 'there's the second of January, the second of
February, right through to the second of December, giving a total of
twelve seconds.'
St Peter looked at the blonde and said, 'I need some time to consider
your answer before I can give you a decision.'
And he walked away shaking his head. A short time later, St Peter
returned to the Blonde.
'I'll allow the answer to stand, but you need to get the third and
final question absolutely correct to be allowed into Heaven.
Now, can you tell me the answer to the name of the swagman in Waltzing
Matilda?'
The blonde replied; 'Of the three questions, I found this the easiest
to answer.'
'Really!' exclaimed St Peter, 'And what is the answer?'
'It's Andy.'
'Andy?''
'Yes, Andy,' said the blonde.
This totally floored St Peter, and he paced this way and that,
deliberating the answer.
Finally, he could not stand the suspense any longer, and turning to the
blonde, asked 'How in God's name did you arrive at THAT answer?'
'Easy' said the blonde..........................
'Andy sat, Andy watched, Andy waited til his billy boiled.'
And the blonde entered Heaven...
And what's worse .. you're now singing it to yourself .....
Oh Chad !
Dearie, dearie me !
But.....Can anyone come up with some sort of definitive answer ?
Why are blondes thought of as being less well endowed mentally ?
Was there once a very famous blonde who everyone thought of as 'thick' ?
I think we should be told.
Cheers - Phil
Trust me Phil, if you'd been married to a blonde for 17 years .... You'd know!
And don't any of you tell her I was here or I'm in trouble ;D
Cheers,
Kev
Filed carefully away for future reference Kev. ;)
Cheers - Phil.
Quote from: Techno on 16 April 2012, 05:12:49 PM
Oh Chad !
Dearie, dearie me !
But.....Can anyone come up with some sort of definitive answer ?
Why are blondes thought of as being less well endowed mentally ?
Was there once a very famous blonde who everyone thought of as 'thick' ?
I think we should be told.
Cheers - Phil
The likes of Marilyn Munroe and Goldie Hawn may have perpetuated the myth of the "dizzy blonde". They were (and are) very talented actresses, of course :x.
Rowan and Martin's Laugh In ?
Blimey !....That brings back memories ;D ;D
And don't forget 'Alice' in The Vicar of Dibley.....and my favourite..... The brilliant Jane Horrocks as 'Bubble' in Absolutely Fabulous
Cheers - Phil.
...Verrry Interesting....
Say goodnight, Dick...
Quote from: clibinarium on 17 April 2012, 12:24:12 PM
...Verrry Interesting....
But thupid ! ;D
Cheers - Phil.
Dumb blonde's nursery rhyme: Hump me, Dump me.
Quote from: FierceKitty on 17 April 2012, 01:40:04 PM
Dumb blonde's nursery rhyme: Hump me, Dump me.
Erm....... :d
IanS