Pendraken Miniatures Forum

Wider Wargaming => General Discussion => Topic started by: FierceKitty on 25 May 2016, 05:58:51 AM

Title: Doomed armies - which one's yours?
Post by: FierceKitty on 25 May 2016, 05:58:51 AM
Of course a wargame tries to give all players a fair chance with whatever armies they're using, or there would be little fun and few players. But which is the army that usually has you worried when you lead it into battle, and why?

For me it's currently the Ava Burmese, who haven't won a battle yet. It's partly that the Chinese have them overwhelmingly outgunned, and the Indians have far better cavalry. Short of getting another SE Asian force, I'm not sure of the solution, but that's not the topic of debate here.
Title: Re: Doomed armies - which one's yours?
Post by: Sandinista on 25 May 2016, 06:07:03 AM
My late medieval Scots usually fail when I play them against the English, limited options with spearmen against bill & bow

Cheers
Ian
Title: Re: Doomed armies - which one's yours?
Post by: Leman on 25 May 2016, 06:16:22 AM
My FPW French are usually subjected to an artillery pounding that tends to knock the stuffing out of them. They do better against Austrians.
Title: Re: Doomed armies - which one's yours?
Post by: Duke Speedy of Leighton on 25 May 2016, 06:24:07 AM
I had a 'never-victorious DAK' army.
Sold them after they won.
Title: Re: Doomed armies - which one's yours?
Post by: Leman on 25 May 2016, 06:35:46 AM
A true Brit! Always support the underdog.
Title: Re: Doomed armies - which one's yours?
Post by: fsn on 25 May 2016, 06:55:42 AM
I had a Greek hoplite army that couldn't withstand an arrow storm. They didn't fight in the shade, they ran for the hills.
Title: Re: Doomed armies - which one's yours?
Post by: FierceKitty on 25 May 2016, 06:56:49 AM
Quote from: fsn on 25 May 2016, 06:55:42 AM
I had a Greek hoplite army that couldn't withstand an arrow storm. They didn't fight in the shade, they ran for the hills.

Mine get into trouble with little cavalry forces driving off their support and turning their flanks.
Title: Re: Doomed armies - which one's yours?
Post by: GrumpyOldMan on 25 May 2016, 07:34:20 AM
Hello FK

This is a hard question because I've always tended to Doomed armies and it's  hard to select a particular one. Memorable debacles include a Hun army that had a human avalanche and decided it would be better to be somewhere else - in turn 2!! Chinese cataphracts beaten by peasant archers taking the general and guard spears out :(. Hindu Indian army that was so unlucky it could get beaten up by the scenery. All disasters but giving me chuckles then and now :)

Cheers

GrumpyOldMan
Title: Re: Doomed armies - which one's yours?
Post by: FierceKitty on 25 May 2016, 07:47:04 AM
I remember the "Night of Terror" scenario game where the Turkish players were so confused by Dracula's raid that the Janissaries shot up and broke the Asian Sipahis. Dracula still lost, but only because he couldn't find Eva Green the sultan.
Title: Re: Doomed armies - which one's yours?
Post by: Steve J on 25 May 2016, 08:03:49 AM
Austrians in the Seven Years War & Seven Weeks War. Maybe I should play them in a conflict without 'Seven' in it... :-\
Title: Re: Doomed armies - which one's yours?
Post by: FierceKitty on 25 May 2016, 08:10:39 AM
My SYW Austrians do OK. I give 'em a few more HC regiments.
Title: Re: Doomed armies - which one's yours?
Post by: pierre the shy on 25 May 2016, 08:19:50 AM
I've always been drawn to Charles the Bold and the Burgundian armies of C14-15.....the "One True Army" or OTA  8)

Charles really was doomed when he decided that he could take on the Swiss Confederation, with third time unlucky for him at the battle of Nancy in 1477 when he was killed. I have the OTA in both 15mm and 25mm, played a lot of DBM with them in the 90's and even won a few games with them :o

I got my handle of Pierre the Shy from a long running DBM campaign that the local club ran. I started off right next to the Swiss player (who was a very good DBM player and nice bloke - he won the NZ DBM national title more than once) so immediately approached him for an aliiance which he was happy to agree to. We all had to come up with suitable names for our leaders so rather than being called Pierre the Bold, Bruce (the Swiss player) thought Pierre the Shy was more in line with my nature  ;)  
Title: Re: Doomed armies - which one's yours?
Post by: Subedai on 25 May 2016, 09:29:51 AM
I had two -a Goblin Army for my one and only foray into GW and an Airfix Ancient British army. The first took on an Easterner army in a club league game and got bladdered before reaching the enemy because they had longbows (Samurai equivalent) and I only had short bows with half the range. Coupled with the fact that he could advance out of cover, shoot and then retire back into cover in the same move. Lost half my army on approach. They went straight onto the next b&b.

The Ancient British fought one disappointing battle before they went back into their boxes. My friend was using an Assyrian army and I decided that as most of my troops were LMI (showing my age) I would have a line of hills in front of his army. Thundered up the hills with my four or five and rolled to charge down the other side. The first warband decided that this wasn't a good idea and routed followed in succession by the others. At the end of the third turn I was left with a single cavalry unit, a skirmisher unit and my chariots. Everything else was running from the hills.

MickS
Title: Re: Doomed armies - which one's yours?
Post by: FierceKitty on 25 May 2016, 09:33:40 AM
The Assyrians must have been undead anyway.
Title: Re: Doomed armies - which one's yours?
Post by: Ithoriel on 25 May 2016, 09:36:22 AM
Can't think of any of my armies that fit the bill, they're all pretty much "you win some, you lose some."
Title: Re: Doomed armies - which one's yours?
Post by: Chris Pringle on 25 May 2016, 11:24:01 AM
My French Republican armies in 1870-1871. Troops that are close to being as bad as the rules can possibly allow, pitted against rather competent Germans. Although the scenarios we fight are pitched to allow either side to win in game terms, I know that even if we win the game it's unlikely to be pretty for the garde mobile (or garde fragile as I like to think of them).

Chris

Bloody Big BATTLES!
https://uk.groups.yahoo.com/neo/groups/BBB_wargames/info
http://bloodybigbattles.blogspot.co.uk/
Title: Re: Doomed armies - which one's yours?
Post by: Kiwidave on 25 May 2016, 10:44:19 PM
Pretty much anything I'm in command of......
Title: Re: Doomed armies - which one's yours?
Post by: Womble67 on 25 May 2016, 10:49:31 PM
I don't have losing armies as such. But if cavalry involved then it dies horribly

Take care

Andy
Title: Re: Doomed armies - which one's yours?
Post by: paulr on 26 May 2016, 04:33:43 AM
Any army commanded by Rhys, a gaming friend of Pierre the Shy and I

His club t-shirt had the following on the back

ATTACK, ATTACK, ATTACK until
a) they are all dead
b) we are all dead

Delete as applicable
Title: Re: Doomed armies - which one's yours?
Post by: FierceKitty on 26 May 2016, 04:47:54 AM
Sounds like a ruleset with a very poor morale section!
Title: Re: Doomed armies - which one's yours?
Post by: Tawa on 26 May 2016, 01:12:09 PM
Every bloody army I play as  ;D
Title: Re: Doomed armies - which one's yours?
Post by: d_Guy on 26 May 2016, 01:44:44 PM
I'm with Plaindave and Tawa - let me try it - I lose with it. My all time favorite army to lose with, however,  were Ral Partha elves back in the late 70's.
Title: Re: Doomed armies - which one's yours?
Post by: Wulf on 27 May 2016, 09:11:10 AM
It's cheating a bit, but in the game 'Battleground: Fantasy Warfare', a miniatures game in a deck of cards (the units are printed in a top-down illustration on the cards), my Lizardmen could not win a single battle. Despite formidable abilities and combat stats, even when my opponent graciously allowed me a bonus they could not make a single Morale check and usually never even got to enter a fight...
Title: Re: Doomed armies - which one's yours?
Post by: skywalker on 27 May 2016, 11:20:03 AM
It started with Space Marines followed by Sisters of Battle, Lizardmen, Space wolves, Imperial Guard, 101st Airbourne, German Fallschirmjager, Late war Germans, Rebel Alliance (X-Wing).

Most of you will think I am a bad General but it's all the fault of the dice......................honest  ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
Title: Re: Doomed armies - which one's yours?
Post by: Last Hussar on 01 June 2016, 09:35:33 PM
I don't have losing armies.

My dice on the other hand...
Title: Re: Doomed armies - which one's yours?
Post by: toxicpixie on 01 June 2016, 11:49:19 PM
Quote from: GrumpyOldMan on 25 May 2016, 07:34:20 AM
Hello FK

This is a hard question because I've always tended to Doomed armies and it's  hard to select a particular one. Memorable debacles include a Hun army that had a human avalanche and decided it would be better to be somewhere else - in turn 2!! Chinese cataphracts beaten by peasant archers taking the general and guard spears out :(. Hindu Indian army that was so unlucky it could get beaten up by the scenery. All disasters but giving me chuckles then and now :)

Cheers

GrumpyOldMan

Are you Big Alan from my club?! He has almost exactly the same story about exactly the same army, no possible way to lose, one lucky shot on one unlucky virtually unstoppable unit followed by a virtually impossible morale fail and the whole army cascaded off table...

For my own part it's Pharaohs Boys. Sweet jebus. The bloody Hittites duff him every time. What's worse is he's got a single overly competent sub commander (usually played by Sniper Al/Sniper Pixie if you know him) who can consistently shoot up, break up and counter charge the Hittite heavies EVERY BLOODY TIME and then looks incredibly smug as the other two thirds of the Egyptian army disintegrates around him. "It's not that hard, look, all you need to do is..."

Mind, in the one true scale I have Hittites and my club mate has Egyptians and she's narrowly lost every time to a combo of expendable screening Syrian javelinmen followed by the heavy mob. The Egyptian Royal Guard always punch above their numbers though, A class discipline with attached general mean they a/ end up somewhere really awkward for me, really easily, and b/ are tough as bloody nails.
Title: Re: Doomed armies - which one's yours?
Post by: GrumpyOldMan on 02 June 2016, 12:21:27 AM
Hello TP

Quote from: toxicpixie on 01 June 2016, 11:49:19 PM
Are you Big Alan from my club?! He has almost exactly the same story about exactly the same army, no possible way to lose, one lucky shot on one unlucky virtually unstoppable unit followed by a virtually impossible morale fail and the whole army cascaded off table...

I am not Big Alan but I feel his pain. In this regard we are all Big Alan :).

Cheers

GrumpyOldMan
Title: Re: Doomed armies - which one's yours?
Post by: fsn on 02 June 2016, 07:00:54 AM
Can we get that made up on t-shirts?

"We are all Big Alan".

Then we could go beat up a Visigoth.
Title: Re: Doomed armies - which one's yours?
Post by: FierceKitty on 02 June 2016, 07:27:24 AM
Quote from: toxicpixie on 01 June 2016, 11:49:19 PM
Are you Big Alan from my club?! He has almost exactly the same story about exactly the same army, no possible way to lose, one lucky shot on one unlucky virtually unstoppable unit followed by a virtually impossible morale fail and the whole army cascaded off table...

For my own part it's Pharaohs Boys. Sweet jebus. The bloody Hittites duff him every time. What's worse is he's got a single overly competent sub commander (usually played by Sniper Al/Sniper Pixie if you know him) who can consistently shoot up, break up and counter charge the Hittite heavies EVERY BLOODY TIME and then looks incredibly smug as the other two thirds of the Egyptian army disintegrates around him. "It's not that hard, look, all you need to do is..."

Mind, in the one true scale I have Hittites and my club mate has Egyptians and she's narrowly lost every time to a combo of expendable screening Syrian javelinmen followed by the heavy mob. The Egyptian Royal Guard always punch above their numbers though, A class discipline with attached general mean they a/ end up somewhere really awkward for me, really easily, and b/ are tough as bloody nails.

Hmm, my Egyptian Royal Guard squadron, led by the Pharoah, yesterday attacked the Assyrian heavy chariots and had a flanking ambush of Sea People auxiliaries support them; and they got wiped out. :( My little lady is still gloating about it today, which is quite cute, really.
Title: Re: Doomed armies - which one's yours?
Post by: FierceKitty on 02 June 2016, 07:28:30 AM
Visigoths are a peaceful people.  Only a tiny minority get the rest a bad reputation.
Title: Re: Doomed armies - which one's yours?
Post by: GrumpyOldMan on 02 June 2016, 07:51:11 AM
Hello

Quote from: fsn on 02 June 2016, 07:00:54 AM
Can we get that made up on t-shirts?

"We are all Big Alan".

Then we could go beat up a Visigoth.

Good idea about the t-shirts. However to beat up the Visigoths, we'd have to use a different army from my Chinese if we wish any chance of success :).

Cheers

GrumpyOldMan
Title: Re: Doomed armies - which one's yours?
Post by: FierceKitty on 02 June 2016, 07:53:05 AM
Chinese and Visigoths (or even Ostrogoths, which would have made a bit less of a geographical headache) didn't spend much time in sword-reach of each other.
Title: Re: Doomed armies - which one's yours?
Post by: Duke Speedy of Leighton on 02 June 2016, 08:13:10 AM
That's because the goths were too busy raving!
https://youtu.be/gwvzP2JcFtg
Title: Re: Doomed armies - which one's yours?
Post by: toxicpixie on 02 June 2016, 09:14:17 AM
I love that video :D

And yes, at some point, we're ALL Big Al. And should probably get t-shirts done but no one would get the reference outside this thread so maybe not!

Although - http://www.warehouse23.com/products/goth-t-shirt (http://www.warehouse23.com/products/goth-t-shirt)

Title: Re: Doomed armies - which one's yours?
Post by: Subedai on 02 June 2016, 11:06:33 AM
Quote from: toxicpixie on 01 June 2016, 11:49:19 PM
Are you Big Alan from my club?! He has almost exactly the same story about exactly the same army, no possible way to lose, one lucky shot on one unlucky virtually unstoppable unit followed by a virtually impossible morale fail and the whole army cascaded off table...

Aha! I know the real Big Alan and claim my prize!

It was him wot had the Easterner army that gave my poor, undeserving Goblins a right tonking. Get Goblins, he said, it'll be fun...
Title: Re: Doomed armies - which one's yours?
Post by: toxicpixie on 02 June 2016, 11:19:22 AM
I might remind him of that next week, it'll guarantee a chuckle :D
Title: Re: Doomed armies - which one's yours?
Post by: KTravlos on 02 June 2016, 11:22:50 AM
My 1877 Russians in BBB. In most battles they are Tactically Inept, Passive and outgunned by the Ottomans. Leaving your starting points always takes a pint of vodka.
Title: Re: Doomed armies - which one's yours?
Post by: Orcs on 02 June 2016, 02:46:05 PM
All my armies are invincible - until I start rolling  the dice
Title: Re: Doomed armies - which one's yours?
Post by: Tawa on 02 June 2016, 02:54:01 PM
Quote from: fsn on 02 June 2016, 07:00:54 AM
Can we get that made up on t-shirts?

"We are all Big Alan".

Then we could go beat up a Visigoth.


It would certainly mean we could find each other at shows......  ;D
Title: Re: Doomed armies - which one's yours?
Post by: Last Hussar on 02 June 2016, 09:56:31 PM
I'm Big Alan

(https://thedeepestred.files.wordpress.com/2012/06/spartacus_thumb.jpg?w=500)
Title: Re: Doomed armies - which one's yours?
Post by: paulr on 02 June 2016, 10:03:00 PM
Quote from: toxicpixie on 02 June 2016, 09:14:17 AM
I love that video :D

And yes, at some point, we're ALL Big Al. And should probably get t-shirts done but no one would get the reference outside this thread so maybe not!

Although - http://www.warehouse23.com/products/goth-t-shirt (http://www.warehouse23.com/products/goth-t-shirt)

Baby Doll sized t-shirts :o :o :o for members of this forum X_X X_X :-& X_X
Title: Re: Doomed armies - which one's yours?
Post by: Tawa on 16 June 2016, 03:36:02 PM
Quote from: paulr on 02 June 2016, 10:03:00 PM
Baby Doll sized t-shirts :o :o :o for members of this forum X_X X_X :-& X_X


:'( :'( :'(