Hope to be back in two or three weeks time.
For the meantime, I'd suggest that nobody sends me PMs or emails....Even if they somehow turn up, I probably won't be able to reply, as this thing is crashing and rebooting so often.
I feel lucky that I've managed to actually type this out !
Bet it crashes as soon as I hit 'post'.
See you soon.
Cheers - Phil.
We'll miss you, Phil! :) Enjoy the peace and quiet! :D
Who is going to look after the coats ? :'( :'(.
IanS
Has he gone? Can we talk about him now?
Good luck mate.
Auditions for cloakroom assistant over at the forum bar fight from 8.
Bring your cv and weapon of choice.
Meanwhile, somewhere in Wales ...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v39WW-gPWOg (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v39WW-gPWOg)
I dont think its his computer. I think he has got all enthusiastic about the Battle of Tekknow,got the woad out and gone off rampaging around Offas Dyke
Now waiting for obvious responses
Me and Dave once rampaged the full length of Offa's Dyke, took us 10 days to do it though.
I bet that wore her out.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ohdJ1DfBF24 (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ohdJ1DfBF24)
=O O:-) =O =O =O =O =O =O =D> =D>
"This is my last post for a while." Techo pressed "send". Then pressed it again. And again. Eventually the machine sluggishly acknowledged his request with a surly ping. Techno turned off the steam and the computer hissed silently as it shut down. "Waste of good Welsh coal". Techno grunted. He'd bought the computer on a whim from a passing Druid and although it connected him to an alternate dimension filled with obviously tortured souls with some pretty weird interests, he was disappointed at the lack of crustaceans. He was sure the Druid had said he could get lots of prawn on the dratted machine.
He revelled in the quiet as the computer burbled into silence, the only sound being the wheezing of the male sheep that the computer used for storing information. He filled his pipe and lit it, idly twisting the green dottle into a perfect eagle warrior, before crushing it without a second thought. He disconnected the mouse from the computer and put it back in its cage. He spread the map of the world on his desk - from Flintshire to Glamorgan, from Pembrokeshire to Offas Dyke, beyond which wisdom said naught lay.
The computer had shown him other possibilities - fantastic lands in which the sky was blue and not grey, where people twisted their faces into odd shapes that he took to denote pleasure and happiness, where words contained consonants and vowels. Over the years, Techno had born and nurtured an obsession that there were lands beyond the Dyke, and he had grown determined to prove it.
He looked at his thin face in the mirror. He rubbed his face and decided he didn't need to shave, so applied the travel woad without preparation. Annoyed, he took off his glasses and cleaned the woad-covered lens. Satisfied with his appearance, he drew on his sealskin coat and his red knitted cap. He picked up his satchel, filled with all that he might need in foreign parts - green putty, The Little Book of Calm, the ingredients of a rarebit and his licence to herd sheep on a Sunday.
He planned to start his journey at twilight, so he wouldn't have to answer embarrassing questions about where he was going or if he was going to make an honest woman of Megan, and knew that if he walked hard for a good hour, he'd be out of territory known to any in the village, and free to pursue his dream.
At the edge of the village, he dropped the letter into Mrs. Davies's. "This is my last post for a while." He explained.
A little further on, he saw a break in a fence. Were it to go unrepaired, sheep could stray, and there would be another feud started like last St Mair's day. He shucked of his rucksack and set the upright back. "This is my last post for a while." He thought.
Continuing his walk, he was somewhat surprised to see a narwhal block his path. He examined the giant creature, but it was dehydrated and close to death. Depressed, he unslung his bugle and blew a mournful tune. "This is my Last Post for a whale."
Techno turned his face to the West and walked backwards towards Offa's Dyke and a world of adventure.
You oik, FSN! >:(
Cheers. Phil.
It's me, FSN, really. I just miss him so much.
Quote from: fsn on 15 September 2014, 05:58:48 PM
It's me, FSN, really. I just miss him so much.
Who?
I think I've found the problem with Techno's PC
(https://fbcdn-sphotos-e-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-xpa1/v/t1.0-9/15403_1050872814942171_6126185414629127408_n.jpg?oh=4f804bd52764dafa0146d91c09fb507c&oe=54CE2AD0&__gda__=1422495826_42cda777112f74bee8027f37700bcec6)
FSN, genius or insanity? Discuss.
Genius AND insanity ML :)
Really depends on which pill he missed that day...
Let's hope Phil gets something that works this time. I believe wind up is the coming sensation. All the best Phil.
Quote from: mad lemmey on 15 September 2014, 06:18:30 PM
FSN, genius or insanity? Discuss.
Enough complexes for an entire conference (With apologies to J. Cleese)
IanS
Or simply too much of the Irn Bru?
Sorry - Irn Bru cant be exported anymore, will be seized by customs at Otcy Mocty.
IanS
Quote from: ianrs54 on 16 September 2014, 11:12:24 AM
Sorry - Irn Bru cant be exported anymore, will be seized by customs at Otcy Mocty.
IanS
Surely customs would be at Gretna not Auchtermuchty?
Not after the invasion.
Quote from: ianrs54 on 16 September 2014, 11:12:24 AM
Sorry - Irn Bru cant be exported anymore, will be seized by customs at Otcy Mocty.
IanS
Well, he would cut it with green Chartreuse and drain-cleaner....
:D ;D :D
Any news on our missing comrade?
Is he still wandering aimlessly around Peecee World?
:(
Isn't that the place where all the sales assistants are one-legged, black lesbians who are into saving the planet. They'll definitely be anti-wargaming.
Oh no! Techno's in real trouble!
Not even his famed putty pushing skills can save him now!
Just worked it out :
Nik reappears
Phil disappers
Both keep a menaginary
THEY ARE ONE AND THE SAME PERSON.
IanS :^o
Isn't last post a somewhat ominous title for this thread?
And Lo, did Ian speak the truth!
And they both live somewhere civilisation can't reach....
Quote from: mad lemmey on 15 September 2014, 06:18:30 PM
FSN, genius or insanity? Discuss.
As a completely normal and sane person :-\. I think he is an insane genius! :)
I read and enjoyed that. what does that make me?
Answers on a post card to:
Last Post Competition.
Near the Sheep.
Somewhere in Wales.
Is he there yet?
Are you people all blind?
Can't you see what's going on?
The Perry's turn their back on the evil empire and all of a sudden Phil dissapears?
He's sculptornapped i tell you! SCULPTORNAPPED!
He's probably chained to a desk with a sculpting tool duct-taped to each hand, accompanied by two lobotomised poor souls, who roll his putty.
I think we must stage a rescue operation before they get him brainwashed into making hover sleds and all that wacky stuff! God knows what they are trying to ma...
Someone at the door? Wonder who would pass this late? looking through the letterbox, don't know the chaps? What's that greenish stuff on their hands?
OH MY GOD IT4S DRIED PUTTY! THEY KNOW WE KNOW OF HIS FATE! THEY ARE COMING FOR US RIGHT NO..............
:o
I'd love to join you ... but they've got armour!
Hmmmm
Seems i missed a pill or 2 yesterday :P :P
That happens to me sometimes. :D I think I hide it well.
Really?
Quote from: petercooman on 21 September 2014, 12:54:51 PM
Hmmmm
Seems i missed a pill or 2 yesterday :P :P
Two of the pink ones, by the sound of it. :o
Quote from: Hertsblue on 21 September 2014, 05:33:17 PM
Two of the pink ones, by the sound of it. :o
Now seriously, how do you know my pills are pink? You've been stealing them for yourself aren't you! :o
;D ;D ;D
No, but he's watching you NOW ! ;)
:-SS :-SS :-SS :-SS :-SS :-SS :-SS
Relax, I am not Big Brother, except to my three step-brothers. ;) (From How to write clumsy English by Strue Innit)
So my pills are safe?
No, but tasty.
Runcorn closed - Centurion on Rampage. Cheshire Police trying to control by warrant.
IanS
I.....Techno the Heliotrope have returned.
Now I've go to work out how to use this new machine....Properly.
At least this is a start !
Cheers - Phil
Welcome back old chap.
Glad to see you back Techno!
Remember if you get stuck just ask here and you'll get .... a whole lot of incomprehensible advice :)
Welcome back, Phil! And may your hard drive always have plenty of free space.
He has returned! Praise be to the Dark Lord that he has let the now slightly over-red one come amongst us once more.
Welcome back. I suppose that means I can't use your signoff anymore. Well, maybe once more for old times sake.
Cheers, Phil.
Welcome back Phil! :D
Welcome back, you have been missed :)
There's a large pile of coats that need sorting ;D
Great to be back team ! :)
I managed to lurk a bit (without signing in)....The last time I tried to log in on the old machine, it went BER-SERK......Then Norton switched itself off...So I was using the net and mails VERY sparingly.
Windows 8 is going to take a little getting used to !....As is this new keyboard....I keep hitting Ctrl instead of the shift key.....Bloody thing.... it seems to be a noticeably different size !
Quick question.....With the all singing/all dancing machine and the new router...am I to assume I'm connected to the net full time unless the PC is switched off ?...Seems to be the case. :-\
Have to sort out a new search engine.....I think I'm just using 'Bing' at the mo',.......and that seems a bit temperamental.
Thanks for keeping the 'sign off' warm, fsn......And s*d the bloody coats !.....You mean to tell me nobody's been keeping a check on those ? ;)
Cheers - Phil
Quote from: Techno on 13 October 2014, 07:09:55 PM
Quick question.....With the all singing/all dancing machine and the new router...am I to assume I'm connected to the net full time unless the PC is switched off ?...Seems to be the case. :-\
If it's all new kit, then you're probably connected even when the PC is turned off! :D
That's what I was presuming......So when the PC gets switched off, so does the power to the whole shebang....Including the router. ;)
Bloody cheek, this morning.....It asked me for a password before I started. Lucky I could remember that !
Now I've got to find where they've hidden the recycle bin, so I can restore one of the photo's of the gee-gees that Mrs Techno deleted by accident last night. ;D ;D ;D ;D
What I'm finding a tad different, is that you seem to HAVE to be connected to the net to find anything out re the system itself, as there's absolutely NO help programmes actually installed on the hard drive, which I'd have found more 'user friendly. (For goodness sake, the hard drive is so massive compared to the old one.... Why didn't they do that ?)
Where are the silly games ?...Oh...you have to download those..(typical)..But you still can't get at them unless you're connected to the net again.
I shall buy a disc of simple card games from Amazon, and put them on the hard drive. Take that, Microsoft. ;D ;D ;D
Cheers - Phil (I still don't like this keyboard.....It's too small.)
QuoteCheers - Phil (I still don't like this keyboard.....It's too small.)
Get yourself a full-size remote keyboard, Phil. Just plug the little gizmo into a serial port and off you go. You can wander around the room with the keyboard if the mood takes you.
Oh, and welcome back. It's been a strain maintaining sanity without your calming presence. :)
Can I have my coat please.....
IanS ;)
Quote from: Hertsblue on 14 October 2014, 07:17:03 AM
Oh, and welcome back. It's been a strain maintaining sanity without your calming presence. :)
True....I do bring a certain gravitas to proceedings. ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
Quote from: ianrs54 on 14 October 2014, 07:57:26 AM
Can I have my coat please.....IanS ;)
I'll sort thro' the heap later, Ian. ;)
Cheers - Phil.
Welcome back, Phil - you could always beat the new thing into submission :)
I seem to be in & out of here like the proverbial...
Thanks, Nik !
I thoght Mrs T was going to try that approach yesterday...Usually me that loses my temper with technology ! >:(
Just tried to send the Dark Lord some pics.....Hope that's worked.
Good to see you back for a 'visit' again. ;) ;D
Cheers - Phil