The Afghan Footballer

Started by Tommy Atkins, 05 September 2013, 09:39:49 AM

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Tommy Atkins

05 September 2013, 09:39:49 AM
The Liverpool FC manager flies to Kabul to watch a young Afghani play football, is suitably impressed and arranges for him to come over.

Two weeks later Liverpool are 4-0 down to Chelsea with only 20 minutes left, the manager gives the young Afghani striker the nod and on he goes.

The lad is a sensation, scores 5 goals in 20 minutes and wins the game for Liverpool. The fans are delighted, the players and coaches are delighted and the media love the new star.

When the player comes off the pitch he phones his mum to tell her about his first day in English football.

'Hello mum, guess what?' he says 'I played for 20 minutes today, we were 4-0 down but I scored 5 and we won. Everybody loves me, the fans, the media, they all love me.'

'Wonderful,' says his mum, 'Let me tell you about my day. Your father got shot in the street and robbed, your sister and I were ambushed, gang raped and beaten and your brother has joined a gang of looters, and all while you were having such great time.'

The young lad is very upset. 'What can I say mum, but I'm really sorry.'

'Sorry?!!! Sorry?!!!' says his mum,
'It's your bloody fault we came to Liverpool in the first place!
Walk wide o' the Widow at Windsor,
For 'alf o' Creation she owns:
We 'ave bought 'er the same with the sword an' the flame,
An' we've salted it down with our bones.

Ferb

05 September 2013, 10:13:10 AM #1
 ;D ;D ;D ;D

Orcs

05 September 2013, 11:13:39 AM #2
 =O =O =O
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Lord Kermit of Birkenhead

05 September 2013, 11:31:48 AM #3
Na - Guns is LONDON..........

IanS
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Techno

05 September 2013, 12:52:40 PM #4
 ;D ;D ;D ;D

fsn

05 September 2013, 05:41:06 PM #5
 ;D ;D ;D

Love it!
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Luddite

05 September 2013, 06:36:37 PM #6
Shouldn't it be 'dat London'?

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nikharwood

05 September 2013, 10:18:48 PM #7
 :D ;D :D

Hertsblue

06 September 2013, 08:33:23 AM #8
Quote from: ianrs54 on 05 September 2013, 11:31:48 AM
Na - Guns is LONDON..........

IanS

No, knives is London, guns is Nottingham.
When you realise we're all mad, life makes a lot more sense.

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Sandinista

06 September 2013, 02:57:02 PM #9
Surely Brixton is where the guns are

nikharwood

06 September 2013, 08:50:57 PM #10
Quote from: Sandinista on 06 September 2013, 02:57:02 PM
Surely Brixton is where the guns are



Oh yes...good call  8)
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