Tiger Woods & Stevie Wonder

[Ferb]

Tiger Woods & Stevie Wonder are in a bar...

Tiger turns to Stevie andsays, "How's the singing career going?"

Stevie replies, "Not too bad. How's the golf?"

Woods replies, "Not too bad, I've had some problems with my swing, butI think I've got that right, now."

Stevie says, "I always find that when my swing goes wrong, I need to stop playing for a while and not think about it. Then, the next time I play, it seems to be allright."

Incredulous, Tiger says,"You play GOLF?"

Stevie says, "Yes,I've been playing for years."

Tiger says, "But --you're blind! How can you play golf if you can't see?"

Stevie Wonder replies,"Well, I get my caddy to stand in the middle of the fairway and call to me. I listen for the sound of his voice and play the ball towards him.Then, when I get to where the ball lands, the caddy moves to the green or farther down the fairway and again I play the ball towards his voice."

But, "How do you putt" asks Tiger.

"Well", says Stevie, "I get my caddy to lean down in front of the hole and call to me with his head on the ground and I just play the ball toward his voice."

Tiger asks, "What's your handicap?"

Stevie says, "Well, actually -- I'm a scratch golfer."

Woods, incredulous, says to Stevie, "We've got to play a round sometime."

Stevie replies,"Well, people don't take me seriously, so I only play for money, and never play for less than $10,000 a hole. Is that a problem?"

Woods thinks about it and says, "I can afford that; OK, I'm game for that.. $10,000 a hole is fine with me. When would you like to play?"

Stevie Wonder says,"Pick a night."

[Steve J]

Oh dear

[robert]

This is true - a local golf club (Eaglescliffe) once held a night time tournament - really!

At each hole was a member holding the flagstick and a torch shining back towards the tee - all went quite well until one of the holders was hit on the head by a driven ball

The tournament was then abandoned as they did not have any safety helmets to hand out.