Things I learned from watching American films

[fsn]

If your best friend dies and you don't see the body, then they're not really dead, but they are orchestrating the mischief that you're getting blamed for.

[Techno]

Has anyone said.......Two dozen 'baddies'......armed  with SMGs can't hit the hero....
Who happens to only be armed with a 'pistol'.......but, yet he still survives.......and the baddies end up as worm meat ?

Cheers - Phil

[fsn]

Good point.

Have you noticed that someone always shouts "RPG" before one is launched, giving the heroes plenty time to dive out of the way?

[FierceKitty]

Japanese cinema:
*  Japanese people communicate in staccato strings of monosyllables, or with a single Hai!.
*   Kimonos never get dirty.
*   Every second man in Japan was Mifune Toshiro.
*   In one of the most militarised societies in history, combat was either a chaotic skirmish, or a massed affair where "advance" and "retreat" were the only orders.
*   Muskets never missed.
*   With masses of Japanese literature to draw on, good Japanese movies rely on Shakespeare and Clint Eastwood.
*   With the advent of colour, it became the overriding concern of every Japanese director to show the world that Japanese people liked cats and that Japanese teenagers fell in love.
*   In a world containing animation, the Japanese will not face the fact that what was ground-breaking fifty years ago has been hopelessly left behind by the Americans.
*   All Japanese ghosts need a hairdresser (OK, this has been around longer than photography).

[steve_holmes_11]

Japanese cinema:
*  Japanese people communicate in staccato strings of monosyllables, or with a single Hai!.
*   Kimonos never get dirty.
*   Every second man in Japan was Mifune Toshiro.
*   In one of the most militarised societies in history, combat was either a chaotic skirmish, or a massed affair where "advance" and "retreat" were the only orders.
*   Muskets never missed.
*   With masses of Japanese literature to draw on, good Japanese movies rely on Shakespeare and Clint Eastwood.
*   With the advent of colour, it became the overriding concern of every Japanese director to show the world that Japanese people liked cats and that Japanese teenagers fell in love.
*   In a world containing animation, the Japanese will not face the fact that what was ground-breaking fifty years ago has been hopelessly left behind by the Americans.
*   All Japanese ghosts need a hairdresser (OK, this has been around longer than photography).

Not to mention that Japanese female education is centred around boarding schools located on giant aircraft carriers.
The carriers house the school, an otherwise unpopulated neighbouring town (See also Harry Potter), some countryside and an abandoned industrial complex containing abandoned WW2 tanks.
The only passtime permitted at school is Tank fighting.
The Volleyball team never play volleyball.

[sunjester]

Japanese cinema:
*
*   In a world containing animation, the Japanese will not face the fact that what was ground-breaking fifty years ago has been hopelessly left behind by the Americans.

But still the plot lines are absolute sh*te!

[Orcs]

but they are orchestrating the mischief that you're getting blamed for.

I know a bit about orchestrating the mischief that you're getting blamed for 

[FierceKitty]

But still the plot lines are absolute sh*te!

Come on - Shrek, The Incredibles, Kung Fu Panda....they don't always work, but there's some dam' good stuff these days.

[flamingpig0]

A pterodactyl is strong enough to carry Raquel Welch

[Heedless Horseman]

Well, He'd certainly have a go, wouldn't He!    

Awful film...wildly inaccurate and possibly, inappropriate, (Huh! ) ...BUT it had  DINOSAURS...(AND RAQUEL WELCH!)     I loved Dinosaurs when a kid...and the 'Walking With' tv 'Docs' too.
Now, the thought that many may have looked like 'Kooky Chickens'...rather puts me off.    

[flamingpig0]

Well, He'd certainly have a go, wouldn't He!    

Awful film...wildly inaccurate and possibly, inappropriate, (Huh! ) ...BUT it had  DINOSAURS...(AND RAQUEL WELCH!)     I loved Dinosaurs when a kid...and the 'Walking With' tv 'Docs' too.
Now, the thought that many may have looked like 'Kooky Chickens'...rather puts me off.    

For a variety of reasons I consider it to be a cinematic masterpiece

[Ithoriel]

Now, the thought that many may have looked like 'Kooky Chickens'...rather puts me off.    

I have to say I was rather disappointed to read that recent research suggests T-Rex didn't look like a giant fluffy chick.

[Lord Kermit of Birkenhead]

No T-Rex is a Cannarey, Red Dwarf said so !

[Ithoriel]

Well, T-Rex and canaries are relatives, however distant, for sure

[Heedless Horseman]

Well, T-Rex and canaries are relatives, however distant, for sure

Oh No...NOT a singing T Rex, Please! 
Tho' this wasn't bad:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wZkTh_T75QY

Have always wondered why film-makers make Dinosaurs ROAR!!! I THINK Crocodilians and Komodos 'Cough' and 'Hisss'.. They probably 'Belch' and 'F**t',  too...but by then, you would either be FAR away or past caring about manners! 

Does anyone remember a Sunday afternoon 'Antiques' TV programme from the '70's... 'Going For A Song'...with a mechanical singing Canary? Could never figure out whether this was real or faked! Lol! 

[fsn]

• Striking someone once on the back of the head is sufficent to knock them out
• They will then wake up, rub the back of the neck and be OK
• Someone who is shot can carry on normally after being attended for five minutes by a disgraced doctor, or better still, a vet

[Techno]

Does anyone remember a Sunday afternoon 'Antiques' TV programme from the '70's... 'Going For A Song'...with a mechanical singing Canary? Could never figure out whether this was real or faked! Lol! 

Sadly, Yes.....Seem to remember there was a chap called Arthur Negus as the resident expert ?

Cheers - Phil

[fsn]

Fake bird

[chrishanley]

If you find yourself with a bunch of friends in an abandoned building and there is some scary music. Don't split up...

[O Dinas Powys]

Oh No...NOT a singing T Rex, Please! 
Tho' this wasn't bad:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wZkTh_T75QY

Have always wondered why film-makers make Dinosaurs ROAR!!! I THINK Crocodilians and Komodos 'Cough' and 'Hisss'.. They probably 'Belch' and 'F**t',  too...but by then, you would either be FAR away or past caring about manners! 

There was an episode of The Curious Cases of Rutherford and Fry - Radio 4 production, available as a podcast with extra bits and well worth a listen - which went into this: https://www.bbc.co.uk/sounds/play/m0004sdq

Based on its size and the assumption that T. rex would have a syrinx like an extant bird, they had it kind of coo-rumbling like an elephantine pigeon if I remember correctly  (More terrifying than it sounds!)

Think I'll have to give it another listen