Forum barfight

Started by Last Hussar, 10 August 2012, 04:39:33 PM

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Ithoriel

Man walks into a bar and says,"Barman, can I ask you a question?"

"Of course, sir," replies the barman,"Ask away!"

"Settle an argument I'm having with my wife, if you can. Do you know if there are any penguins that are five foot six tall?"

"Well, sir, I know some penguins grow to be three or four foot tall but I'm pretty sure there are none that big."

"B***er!,"exclaims the man,"The wife's right, I've run down a nun in your car park!"
There are 100 types of people in the world, those who understand binary and those who can work from incomplete data

Techno

Give me strengthX_X X_X X_X

(Have we laid Nobby off, as far as coat chewing is concerned ?) =)

Cheers - Phil

Last Hussar

Well, that's one way to restart a bad right.

Crichton, bring my socially distanced punching poles.
I have neither the time or the crayons to explain why you are wrong.

GNU PTerry

Orcs

Quote from: Techno on 26 March 2020, 04:06:20 PM
(Have we laid Nobby off, as far as coat chewing is concerned ?) =)

Cheers - Phil

No, but he has to sanitise the coat with hand gel first, and as hand gel is currently rarer than Rocking Horse Manure and Hens Teeth its getting a bit tricky.

Plus he keeps complaining that the hand gel "Tastes Funny".  I have told him that we are in difficult times and to man up and just chew.

We also have to ensure he keeps the correct social distance while chewing said persons coat. This is even harder than finding hand gel as Nobby likes to chew coats while the owner is wearing them (a bit like a dog humping someones leg I suppose).

The cynics are right nine times out of ten. -Mencken, H. L.

Life is not a matter of holding good cards, but of playing a poor hand well. - Robert Louis Stevenson

Lord Kermit of Birkenhead

Surely we can find some mint flavoured stuff !
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Lord Kermit of Birkenhead
Muppet of the year 2019, 2020 and 2021

Orcs

Quote from: ianrs54 on 27 March 2020, 07:14:12 AM
Surely we can find some mint flavoured stuff !

Lets try mixing it with toothpaste....... Orcs puts finger in pot and takes tentative lick.

MMMMM tastes like Crème de Menthe.

No excuses now Nobby  - Get chewing the following coats, Ithoriel, Westmarcher, and for the hell of it Technos. ( just watch out for scalpel blades in the pockets and the used plasters)






The cynics are right nine times out of ten. -Mencken, H. L.

Life is not a matter of holding good cards, but of playing a poor hand well. - Robert Louis Stevenson

fsn

Ummm ... chaps?

I've found something out about Westie when I ripped his coat  ...


He keeps mints in one of his pockets  :D

The photo? Well, why not?
Lord Oik of Runcorn (You may refer to me as Milord Oik)

Oik of the Year 2013, 2014; Prize for originality and 'having a go, bless him', 2015
3 votes in the 2016 Painting Competition!; 2017-2019 The Wilderness years
Oik of the Year 2020; 7 votes in the 2021 Painting Competition
11 votes in the 2022 Painting Competition (Double figures!)
2023 - the year of Gerald:
2024 Painting Competition - Runner-Up!

Orcs

Wouldn't mind giving that a nibble :d
The cynics are right nine times out of ten. -Mencken, H. L.

Life is not a matter of holding good cards, but of playing a poor hand well. - Robert Louis Stevenson

Lord Kermit of Birkenhead

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Lord Kermit of Birkenhead
Muppet of the year 2019, 2020 and 2021

Westmarcher

Now you know why I'm always fumbling about when I wear that coat.   :D

(searching for my mints, of course)
I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I needed to be.

Techno

We believe you, Davy.  ;)

Cheers - Phil

Lord Kermit of Birkenhead

Wrong Phil, YOU believe Davy, the rest of us aren't that gullible... ;)
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Lord Kermit of Birkenhead
Muppet of the year 2019, 2020 and 2021

Techno


Orcs

Quote from: ianrs54 on 28 March 2020, 07:15:36 AM
Down boy - down... ;) ;)

I'll start from the bottom and work up, I'm not fussy.
The cynics are right nine times out of ten. -Mencken, H. L.

Life is not a matter of holding good cards, but of playing a poor hand well. - Robert Louis Stevenson

Westmarcher

My round! Malt whiskies all round to celebrate my promotion to Major General!   <:-P :O)

.... damn it, the bar's still shut!   #:-S

Thanks to all for their congratulations in the Covid-19 thread.  :-[
I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I needed to be.